Paying Attention to Your Marriage

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We were five years into our marriage. I threw my bags in the trunk and buckled my babies in the back seat. The rain poured from the sky leaving me soaking wet. I’m leaving. I can’t stay with him anymore. I have completely fallen out of love with him. I hate him.

As I saw his shadow staring at me in the rearview mirror I started to think about our past. I was 16 and he was 18 the first time we met each other. He was charming, kind and had a smile that made my knees go weak. We couldn’t get enough of each other. But now all I wanted to do was get away from him.

How did this happened?

How had we gotten to this point?

How could our once strong, forever love have grown so cold?

Life had happened to us. Five years and two kids later we were struggling. It was hard, and painful. Disappointments, struggles, empty promises, and unmet expectations.

Wasn’t this supposed to be a fairy tale?

Wasn’t love all we needed?

Weren’t we supposed to live happily ever after?!

Well, yes. We can live happily ever after. But it doesn’t just happen. Marriage needs constant care. It deserves our time and attention.

Here are four tips to help you pay attention to your marriage.

Communicate - Communicating tells your spouse, "I care about you." Be real with each other about what you need, and what you see, even if it isn't what they (or you) want to hear.

Consecrate - Remember your marriage is holy. Grasp the fact that marriage was meant to draw us closer to Christ. Your spouse was never intended to fulfill and complete you, only Jesus can do that. Your marriage is meant to be an example of how Christ loves us.

Collaborate - Work together to improve your marriage: attend a conference, join a couples bible study, pray together. Growing together will keep you from easily growing apart.

Choose - Each day wake up and choose to be married. Decide your marriage is worth your time and energy. Decide that your spouse is worth your love.

After a lot of hard work and communication, we’ve been able to repair our marriage. It takes time and attention every day, but it is so worth it! Yes, we still have disagreements. Yes, we still struggle. But because we decide every day that our marriage is worth working for, our marriage is working.

Are you working on your marriage? Are you improving in it? There is always room to grow, to have the kind of life changing marriage that people around you notice something different.

Reach for the kind of marriage that God can use for His glory.


Interested in attending the Marathon Marriage Conference March 10-11? Register Here

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